To Save You
by Hanakosong
Summary: Castiel has been living on his own for a few weeks now and finds himself wanting to talk to Dean. When he gets ahold of his friend, things start to go very wrong for Castiel, and he's not so sure that he can save himself, let alone save Dean, this time. [based of a chat with the amazing Vic and Robin] {Destiel}


**For Vic and Robin**

* * *

Ever since Dean had told Castiel that he wasn't allowed to stay at the bunker, Cas had been wandering around in search of a place to stay and a simple job that would get him enough money to keep himself going. Luckily, Cas had been able to swing a job at a small Gas N' Sip station a few towns over from Lebanon and he had managed to rent out a cheap apartment room. The room was nice enough, nothing fancy but still in function for Cas' basic needs. The job he had was also nice; the people were friendly and the customers familiar on almost a daily basis. But despite all that, Cas still wasn't completely happy.

He missed Dean. He missed Sam and Kevin and the bunker. The bunker had an aura about it, an aura that reminded Cas of a home. Maybe it was the way Dean and Sam had settled in and made it there home. Or maybe it was the feeling that came from sitting around eating burritos with the two boys. Or maybe it was even just the water pressure in the shower that Cas enjoyed so much. It didn't matter what it was, Cas simply enjoyed it there and he knew he would never really be happy if he wasn't with the boys at the bunker.

Cas had been on an earlier shift today, working before the sun had even peeked over the horizon until around three in the afternoon. Cas dragged his feet as he made his way back to his apartment, not really wanting to go back there, knowing that he would have to find something to do with himself for the rest of the day eventually. But there wasn't really any other place that Cas wanted to go, so he continued on his way to the apartment building.

The building that Cas lived in was only a few blocks from the station he worked at so it wasn't long before he was slipping into his little room and closing the door securely behind him.

As Cas moved about his little temporary home, he was aware of a dull ache that was throbbing painfully in his chest, something he very well knew the cause of. Glancing at the laptop that Sam had provided him with before his departure from the bunker, Cas sighed wistfully. He had been taught how to use the strange device so he might get into contact with Sam and Dean should he need to, and considered sitting down and seeing if he could get ahold of the boys.

Cas, after pacing about for a bit, thinking about contacting the boys, finally sat down in front of the laptop and turned the device on. While waiting for it to power up, Cas stretched his arms over his head and wondered about the last time he had slept soundly. Evidently, he couldn't remember.

As the screen lit up and switched over to the desktop, Cas searched for the little symbol that Sam had told him about that would allow him to talk to them. Finding the little symbol, Cas pulled up the window and followed the instructions that Sam had given him to be able to talk to the boys over the computer. After a moment, Cas found himself looking at Dean.

Dean flashed Cas a large, genuine smile and Cas found that he had almost automatically returned the grin.

"Cas! Hey buddy, what's up? Not gotten yourself into any trouble, I hope?" Dean's face took on a little concern, but Cas quickly dismissed it with a shake of his head.

"No, I'm fine, Dean. I was just checking in since I'm not busy right now."

The two talked for while about little things, what Dean had been hunting, about the job Castiel had found and the crappy little apartment he was living in. They avoided the things that were really important, taking time to just really catch up with each other after spending almost a month apart. During one of their little pauses, Cas looked down at his hands and sighed quietly, knowing that he couldn't really stay online with Dean forever. He was rather tired from work and wanted to sleep. But at the same time, he really didn't want to say goodbye to Dean yet.

Cas looked up from his hands and found himself staring at Dean again. But this wasn't his normal stare where he just sat and took in Dean's face. There was suddenly something off with Dean, something he couldn't place. The smile that Dean was giving him felt a little more menacing, a little more…sadistic.

"What's wrong Castiel?" Dean asked, a grin playing at his lips. "Something bothering you?"

Castiel was very aware of the sudden change in Dean's attitude and voice. Shifting uncomfortably in his seat, Cas shook his head and fiddled with the cuffs of his sleeves. He could still feel Dean's gaze boring into him, refusing to let him go.

Looking up at Dean, Cas sighed with worry lacing through him. He couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. Every part of Cas was screaming at him, tugging at him, urging him to go and see Dean at the bunker, just to make sure he was really okay.

Almost as if Dean had read Cas' mind, he spoke up. "Hey, Cas. Why don't you come over to the bunker for a little while? Just a visit so we can meet up. I think Sammy and Kevin are out right now so we can just catch up."

Cas wanted that more than anything, and he was relieved when Dean had asked him. But there was something that was suddenly telling him not to go, that something was seriously wrong and he was better off not going after all. Ignoring the feeling in the pit of his stomach, Cas nodded told Dean he would be there in about a half an hour before closing his laptop.

* * *

As Castiel sat on the bus that would take him to Lebanon, he found himself constantly fidgeting in his seat, glancing around at the other passengers and out the window. He couldn't seem to shake the feeling of dread that was pressing heavily against his chest.

It hadn't even felt like a half hour had passed when Cas climbed down the steps of the bus. He headed off in the direction he remembered the bunker to be in. While he walked, Castiel kept a firm grip on the strap of his bag that safely stored his laptop. He didn't really know why he had brought it with him but it had been a last minute feeling that he didn't really feel like ignoring.

Luckily the bus had dropped him off rather close to the bunker and Cas trotted down the stairs to the heavy set metal door and knocked sharply, wincing slightly at the sting on his knuckles from the harsh metal.

Moments later, Dean appeared in the doorway, a smile gracing his face. Castiel almost returned the smile before he realized that it was not Dean's normal smile. Before he had the chance to react, Castiel was yanked inside the bunker with the loud clang of the door shutting following him inside.

Cas backed away quickly from Dean, not entirely sure of what was going on, only knowing that something was extremely off with Dean. He didn't know what, he just knew he had to get away from him. And that thought pained Cas more than anything. He didn't want to run from Dean, he wanted to stay with Dean.

Dean advanced on Cas, grinning in the most narcissistic way Castiel had ever seen. Scrabbling backwards, Cas found himself pressed against the wall, his breathing quick and uneven as Alex stalked closer to him, eyes glittering. Dean suddenly pinned Cas to the wall by his upper arms, painfully driving Cas' shoulders into the cold wall behind him. Dean leaned in and brushed his nose also Castiel's shoulder, humming to himself.

"You know," Dean mused as he pulled back and looked down at Castiel's frightened blue irises. "I was a little afraid of going after an angel before, but now that such a pretty little gem like you has fallen, into my path I might add, I think I'd like to jump at this opportunity and experiment, wouldn't you Castiel?"

Cas' eyes widened, his pupils dilating in fear as he resisted against Dean's hold. Dean shoved Cas back against the wall roughly, stunning him as Dean's fist grazed over Cas' cheek before pinning him again.

"Now, now," Dean cooed, dipping down to Cas' neck. "Behave, you," he whispered before sinking his teeth into the crook of Cas' neck, drawing a scream from the fallen angel. Dean hadn't broken the flesh, but there was a rough bruise already forming on Cas' pale skin.

When Cas began to resist again, Dean's fist connected with Cas' ribs, winding him and causing Cas to slightly curl in on himself as he gasped for air. Dean released Cas with a smirk, letting him drop to the ground in a gasping, bruised, and slightly bloodied mess. Dean stood over Cas, as if admiring his work on the used to be angel. Reaching down, Dean hauled Cas up by the collar of his shirt and grinned as he straddled Cas.

"Dean…?" Cas coughed out, looking up at him through one slightly swollen eye. "What…are you doing?"

Chuckling roughly, Dean's fist scraped teasingly across Cas' cheek once again before he was released, letting Cas fall limply to the floor as he stood up. As Cas hit the floor, he drove his shoulder roughly into the cold ground, drawing a grunt from his lips.

"What's wrong, Castiel?" Dean purred from above him. "I thought we could play together for a little while. Now be a good little fallen angel and hold still."

Castiel ignored the white-hot pain racing through his body and scrambled to his feet, dragging his bag along with him before taking off further into the bunker. He could hear Dean's footstep's echoing behind him, making Cas run only faster. Spotting an open door, Cas ducked inside of it and slammed it shut. Searching frantically, Cas grabbed a nearby piece of chalk and drew a quick Devil's Trap on the door before bolting it shut and scrabbling to the other side of the room. He had no idea why he had drawn a Devil's Trap on the door, figuring it was probably just from habit after being chased by demons for so long.

Pulling out his laptop, Cas tried to see if he could contact Sam or even Kevin and get some help. But just as he was about to, Dean's face appeared on his screen, grinning that sadistic grin of his as he pouted mockingly.

"Why did you run away, Castiel? We were just starting to have some fun, weren't we?"

Castiel shook his head and started to look over his wounds. They stung quite a bit and he gingerly poked at his cheek, knowing that it was already starting to bruise over most likely. Glancing around, Cas found with despair that he had bolted himself inside a room with no other doors and no windows to escape by. Turning back to his wounds, Cas felt an ache for his old powers where he could heal himself with a tap of his fingers.

Cas looked up from inspecting his injuries and found himself greeted by a glimpse of Dean's eyes. The familiar green irises that Cas had come to know where flooded with inky blackness, including the whites of Dean's eyes. Cas's hands gripped the edges of his laptop tightly as fear began to course through him.

"Dean?" Cas asked in a meek, broken voice, knowing full well that this was not, in fact, Dean. This was something entirely different that possessed his friend.

"Not quite," the demon confirmed Cas' fears. "But I think you'll find I'm fantastic company either way," he purred mockingly, grinning at Cas as the black eyes flickered back to normal.

"H-how are you possessing Dean? I thought he was marked with an anti-possession tattoo. No demon should be able to get inside him."

Dean, or not Dean, smirked; making Cas shiver with misgivings as he tried to maintain control over his emotions, still not entirely used to them yet.

The demon chuckled darkly and leaned back in his chair before pulling aside the shirt he wore to reveal a rough looking patch of skin where Dean's tattoo used to be. "I had to do some…remodeling on this attractive vessel before I could get inside him. I borrowed one of Hell's guard dogs for the task, in case you were wondering."

Cas felt the sudden urge to throttle this demon through the computer, but he didn't know how so he refrained from doing so, feeling as if he was going to explode with anger. Ever since Cas had fallen, he had felt nothing but helplessness. He was unable to help his brother's and sisters, unable to help Dean, Sam, and Kevin, unable to even help himself sometimes. And this situation he found himself in really drove home the fact that Castiel could do absolutely nothing to save Dean.

Castiel's thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the demon leaning in towards the camera and chuckling lightly.

"I must say, Castiel. I knew who you were before this, but I find that you are actually far more attractive in person. It's a shame that you're already claimed for. I'm Alexander by the way. But you can call me Alex," he said with a wink.

Cas ground his teeth together and stared down this Alex demon that possessed Dean.

"What do you even want with Dean? How did you even get into the bunker in the first place?" Cas asked, remembering that Dean had told him there was no way any kind of supernatural force could enter without destroying themselves six ways from Sunday.

"Well," Alex smirked. "There's a funny little question. You see I borrowed Dean about two maybe three weeks ago to help Crowley out of the Impala's trunk. And even though I gave control back to Dean here without him even knowing he had lost it, I never actually left. I kind of just lurked in the shadows for a while. But then I heard handsome here talking to you and well," Alex paused to smirked yet again. "I just had to meet the famous destroyer of Heaven. Which I guess I should probably thank you for by the way. After all, you helped to take out Hell's biggest obstacle. Now, we demons can have all the fun we want."

Castiel looked down at his hands, his knuckles prominently white against his skin as he clenched his hands together. He knew that he shouldn't be allowing Alex to get to him like this, but the problem was, everything he had said about Castiel was true. There was no denying it. And Cas was fed up with feeling useless. Looking up, Cas glared as best he could at Alex.

"Why did you torture me?" Castiel asked harshly, his bruises throbbing painfully.

Alex looked offended, pulling Dean's lips into a fine little pout. "Ouch, Castiel. Torture is such a harsh word."

Castiel looked at Alex suspiciously, rubbing his shoulder while wincing slightly before asking, "Then what would you call it?"

Alex pulled Dean's lips from the pout into a twisted grin as he quirked an eyebrow.

"Foreplay, Castiel," Alex whispered.

Castiel shuddered, unable to suppress the motion as it wracked through his body. Alex chuckled from the screen, his inky black eyes flicking into view, obscuring Dean's green ones.

"And you resisting," Alex made a little noise of happiness that sounded like a whistle to Castiel. "Well, Castiel, that just means that you're ready to play to me. I have to admit, I always do enjoy prey that's a challenge to catch. Makes the hunt more, fun, in my opinion," Alex said, adding emphasis to the word 'fun'.

Cas couldn't take it anymore. He didn't like this demon that was possessing Dean, and he was starting to feel helpless all over again, not that the feeling had ever left in the first place.

"Leave Dean alone," he said sharply, in a dangerously low tone. "Leave him alone right now, or I swear, I will not rest until I've found you and put an end to you."

"Oh, Castiel. You make me get excited when you talk like that." Alex winked at Cas and chuckled darkly. "Okay big boy, how about a deal? You come out of that guarded room of yours and let me do whatever I please to you for the rest of the night, and I'll leave Dean alone, for now."

Cas looked down and thought about Alex's deal. There was a voice screaming inside of his head, telling him to stay exactly where he was until help arrived, knowing that Sam or Kevin would come back eventually and save Cas.

Save him. That was what everyone had to do now, save Cas. He was so tired of being saved, and he knew that he had to save Dean this time, in whatever way he could. Looking up at Alex, Cas nodded and said softly, "I'll do it."

Alex grinned widely, his eyes glittering with menace. "Good boy, Castiel. Now go and unbolt that door there, and I promise. We will have a great time."

Cas put the laptop aside and stood on shaky legs. He slowly made his way over to the door, his mind going back and forth over going through with the deal and backing out before it was too late. And all to soon, Cas was standing in front of the door, his hand hovering over the bolt for the door, his conscious screaming so annoyingly loud at him to back away now, to wait for Sam to come back and deal with the demon.

_No_, Cas thought firmly. _I have to save Dean this time. I am_ not _useless_.

And with that, Cas gripped the bolt in his hand and pulled it aside, allowing the door to swing open before he quickly moved back to his laptop and looked at Alex through the screen, but he was no longer there. Cas shut the laptop and quickly put it away. Looking up, he found a figure standing in the doorway, a grin stretched across their features.

"Hello, Castiel," Alex crooned. "Ready to have fun?"

* * *

**A/N: So this little fic is based off of the chat that the lovely and amazing Vic and Robin held a few weeks ago. I know that this is rather belated because life got in the way, but hey, here it is. I know it's not my best but yeah, I said I'd do it and I kind of enjoyed writing this.**

****Edit** Thank you Vic for the wonderful critic on Alex's personality. I hope I portrayed him better with the edits I added. ^_^**


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